to the first one who broke my heart.

If you're reading this one, you may now throw it together with the doodle above in the wastebasket and kill me now. After all, you have poisoned my thoughts since I met you in the stairway back in 2001. I never thought it was THAT deadly...as I remember how much I admired you to the point of hurting myself. But I tell you, shall we meet again someday, I must pretend that I didn't know you at all. After all, I've changed a lot--and I bet you did, too.
Thanks for making me sick in a good way, dude. Even though you hurt me emotionally too many times without you knowing it, I’m grateful that you were the first one whom I thought I loved. Still, what I felt for you was just too shallow (although it lasted for four years, I suppose)—I guess I wasn’t aware of the consequences then.
Okay, I’ll just end this right now. Whatever happens, I’ll always remember you—even in my dreams.

Yours truly,
Cloudy/charmed.angel13

P.S. I wish you were gay. HAHAHA. Actually, I always wished I’m a lesbian in order to get over you, but there is no surefire way to erase the pain I had because I fell too much. It will always be imprinted inside my heart—no matter how hard I try to forget.

***
O HAI, doods. Pardon me for being such a lazy bunny today—I’m spending too much time tweaking my accounts rather than on schoolwork. Since I couldn’t concentrate much on work, I decided to post something here.
This letter above is meant for someone who first broke my heart. Each time I think about it, I always tell myself how stupid I was to fall for such a seemingly nice guy like him. But years have passed since he left for another school, and I somehow learned how to move on.
I may not be following the 30-day letter challenge rules, but at least I have spilled out everything I want to say—even though he wouldn’t bother to read this at all. :D